would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
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