Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
Randomize
