Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
It's not my fault. Someone keeps buying me tequila shots. Idk who. But every time I look down there's another. I think there's a conspiracy.
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
Found the puke drawer
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
Randomize