I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
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