We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
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