You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
i've created a new STD.
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
Randomize
