is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
Randomize
