and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Randomize