You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
Hurry up. We're trading phones to prevent drunk texting.
Everything about him screamed your future.
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
Randomize