So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
almost dropped my phone in the toilet but it somehow bounced off my tit and landed on the floor. Boobs: saving me hundreds of dollars in bar tabs and smartphones since '09
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
Randomize
