Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
The bartender just started bringing me gin and tonic in a pint glass to save himself trips...
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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