butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
That rando I gave head to on the beach just endorsed me on LinkedIn for Oral Communication Skills. So there's that.
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
Your shirt... Was in my pants
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
Randomize