I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
Randomize
