i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
I am not kidding you. There is an airport luggage cart overturned in my driveway. We need to stop going to the airport bar.
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
Her car is covered in frozen vomit, and she lost her iPhone. I'm also pretty sure I smoked crack last night. Rest in peace 2014.
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
Remember when I convinced you to watch me eat my sandwich just so you could reuse my plate and save us money on our water bill? I'm so ecofriendly when I'm high
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
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