Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
