just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
Im just a social blackout drinker.
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
I'm pretty sure I just crapped out my pancreas. I have 2 of those, right?
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
She made me pour olive oil on her.
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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