your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
when i say i joined a midget dating site why do u assume i was drunk
I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
as we were stuffing their 24 of beer into our bags you kept saying you wanted cheese strings. closest things we found were kraft singles. as the guys came up the stairs you kept screaming 'GET THE CHEESE! GET THE CHEESE!'
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
Randomize
