Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
Dude. My knees have no hair on them and they're bruised. My thigh is killing me. I have about 1000 texts to about 5 exes which I horribly regret. I have pictures of my own penis on my phone. I can't find my iPad. And I have work in an hour.
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
Randomize
