did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
Fuck you. Fuck this party. I just wanted to be pretty with a cute little tiara and boys sucking my tits, now i have a hangman game drawn on my face and jello shots in my hair.
I wanted to give you a great birthday party. You know I did.
Randomize
