I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
I woke up to an email from Groupon for 3 laser lipo treatments...on Valentine's Day...way to kick me when I'm down Groupon.
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
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