I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
So I spent all night thinking my bed was floating down a river and telling the cats to get on the bed because they were going to float away. Percocet is strong shit.
I just had to explain to a 5 year old why I had fuzzy handcuffs hidden in a macaroni box under my bed.
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
Randomize
