doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
I love having hate sex.
The doctor said 'youre the 2nd youngest person that ive seen with this condition. Thats probably not the silver medal you were looking for today.'
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
Randomize
