cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
Randomize
