Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
Randomize
