Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
Randomize