me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
Apparently getting drunk at a philanthropy event and tweeting about it is "frowned up"
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
Do you remember telling our cab driver you were going to fuck a penguin?
I wrote myself a letter, like I think drunk me wants to be pen pals or something
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
Randomize
