You made me cry and you don't even care
Note to self. Condoms are not microwavable.
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
Randomize