What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
I'm using toast as a chaser. If I wasn't already so fucked up this would be revolting.
Lmao I should put that ad on Craigslist "in need of muscular and determined team of men to carry drunken birthday whore safely home"
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
Randomize
