he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
Randomize
