so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
Oh you know just explaining sexual consent to a drunk 80 year old man. How is this my life?
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
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