I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
Too much gin, very little bucket
the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
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