and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
Randomize
