i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
Hey just to warn you theres a really fat guy passed out in front of our front door snoring. Don't touch him, he's in god's hands now.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
Oh god. It's like a broken faucet. My guts sound like a bilge pump clogged with golf balls and cake frosting.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
New guy at work just gave me a Percocet for my headache. Officially best friends
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
Randomize
