We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
I paid some man $10 for his shirt last night cause I liked it. Explains that. Bought the jackolope head from a street vendor. Got invited to someone's hotel rooftop swimming pool which explains why I was in my bathing suit. My clothes from last night are MIA. Going over the border with no pants on is awkward. Origins of the car rim still mysterious.
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
Randomize
