you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
Wingman of the year award. I made out with her gay roommate in order for you to get laid. Better have been good.
The gay roommate was probably better than her. Consider yourself lucky.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
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