Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
Randomize
