She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
Randomize
