I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
i awoke yet another morning with penis breath. ive been so generous santa has to bring me a shit ton of presents
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
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