paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
If I could pick any std, I would pick genital herpes. Seriously. Have you seen the commercials? The lady is riding a fucking bike, swimming, and on a date. I have a perfectly fine vag and all I do is go to the library.
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
Im part way to drunk.
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
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