My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
Randomize
