JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
Randomize
