Yo dont text me then not text me
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
Enjoy your early 30’s! You’re still young enough to catch a twenty something that can fuck 4 times a day, hot enough to date forty year old penises that can last long enough to give you multiple orgasms
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