We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
i can't put facebook on my resume under hobbies.
when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
Randomize
