dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
... drunk me broke the coffee table?
STOP TALKING ABOUT YOURSELF IN THE THIRD PERSON. YOU DID THE THING.
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
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