i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
