You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
my life is one jail cell away from being a bad country music song.
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
Why is "Oprah of drinks" written on my arms?
You said to write it on you, after you kept saying, "You get a drink, you get a drink, everyone gets a drink."
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
Randomize
