WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
I won't apologize to a one balled man
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
Randomize
