So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
I just asked my hair stylist how many percocets she'd do my hair for.
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
I just shit my bed. Go ahead and make your 40 year old incontinence jokes now.
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
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