stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
and thats when i went through the window and a shard of glass got stuck in my ass. the doctor said it was the best injury hed seen all month. i am a champion of life.
Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
Is this like a preordered booty call?
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
Randomize
