I figured girls wouldn't be down to sleep w/ a guy who plugged a pregnant chick
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
Randomize
